Livingston Out Loud: who says dissension, discussion, and dysfunction can't be fun?

Volume 1: Issue 7
September 1, 2005

A wrong turn out of the Absarokas spelled trouble for a vacationing couple from Minnesota and downtown Livingston. Large RVs like these are more and more common in the Livingston area as tourists feel the need to bring something of their home lives with them when they travel

The couple touring in the RV were just as surprised by the event. Duke Dessel was driving while his wife Wilma was baking an apple Bundt cake in the couple's Atwood Vision RV Range with centralized high output burner and improved flame distribution. "I come out of that storm and suddenly there was a town," explained Duke. "I hit the brakes just in time and our Hoppy Brake-Force Electric Trailer Brake Control kicked in right when I needed it to. Although things was shaken up a bit."

The Montana State Police officer who was called to the scene commented, "Recreational vehicles are just getting bigger and bigger every tourist season, no matter what happens with gas prices. Combine that with the increased use of backcountry trails by motorized vehicles like these, and you have yourself a recipe for disaster." Wilma was treated for confectioner's sugar inhalation, and the couple was questioned and released.

Above: A Livingston artist captured the mood in town as Livingston steels itself for another season of civic life. The painting is set on the Lagoon Bridge. The bridge, painted with its Christo wrapping still intact, was the subject of controversy before summer vacations brought a needed lull in dissension.

Bush declares Armstrong "a good rider."
Livingston hopes to cash in on presidential insight.
It's the kind of insightful pronouncement that Americans have come to expect from acting President George W. Bush. After a ride on August 20th with seven time Tour de France winner Lance Armstrong, Bush proclaimed the bicycle riding Texan "a good rider."

This assessment puts to rest the doubts about Armstrong's ability on the bike. Sports analysts and fans alike have long felt that Armstrong is "just an average rider" with an impressive publicity team.

France is impressed, too. Although Mr. Bush and the people of France feel mutual contempt, the French believe that he is moving closer to understanding their culture by taking vacation time seriously. In France, as in other parts of Europe, there is a tradition of "going on holiday" for 5 to 8 weeks a year. Getting the Tour de France winner to take playtime with him just adds to Bush's dim but growing luster in Gallic eyes. The pronouncement from the president has also quieted the fresh allegations that Armstrong used performance enhancing drugs during his first Tour victory.

Good news is also on the way for football fans who have wondered "just how good is Peyton Manning?" The NFL has been in contact with the Lazy W Ranch in Crawford where Bush is on a three and a half month vacation. They are hoping to get the president to catch a few passes and break some tackles with the NFL's alleged superstars.

Bush's most recent pronouncement also adds credible weight to his other keen observations such as "America is a big country," "Africa is a nation," and "when you engage the terrorists abroad, it causes activity and action."

If Livingston succeeds in getting a presidential visit (see feature), the town's boosters, citizen groups, and culture mavens are hoping to get Bush to comment on trout fishing, the area's mountains, the Lagoon Bridge lighting project, and The Pretty Good String Band.

Governor Schweitzer met this week with legislators and Montana Secretary of Defense Denny Rehberg to put together an immediate plan to withdraw Montana troops from Maine (see Volume 1, Issue 6). Sources close to the Governor said he was never convinced war was necessary, and with troops needed to help with Katrina disaster relief it is time to end "this ridiculous war."

Political pundits who place the governor's name on any reasonable list of future Democratic presidential hopefuls feel that this humanitarian and peaceful bent might doom his chances with a conservative nation willing to tolerate multi-billion dollar wars abroad while infrastructure crumbles here at home. But the public's reception of the news has been overwhelmingly positive. "It's a relief to have a leader who sees a choice between going fishing or taking decisive and effective action decide to choose the latter," said Morris Wells, a plumber in Helena.

Denny Rehberg, who earlier this year praised George W. Bush's "Oprah Winfrey-style" in working a room on his Social Security plan (above, in Great Falls), is less than thrilled with Schweitzer's plans to end the war. Oprah Winfrey is less than thrilled with being compared to George W. Bush.