Activist judges redefine traditional marriage: Don’t let this happen again!
December 27, 2008 | Filed Under Uh-oh, Other Satire/Intentionally Funny Stuff | 1 Comment
In 1967, activist judges redefined traditional marriage. Not content to let states decide for themselves, the Supreme Court ruled in Loving v. Virginia that banning inter-racial marriage was unconstitutional. History has proven how destructive that was of “traditional marriage.” We must not let that happen ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever again. Tsk, tsk! 
For your “activist judges” swag, click the image at right (© LavenderLiberal.com).
Barack Obama stands by his promise of change for gay Americans
December 23, 2008 | Filed Under Other Satire/Intentionally Funny Stuff | 1 Comment
Responding to the outcry of progressives and gay Americans over anointing his special friend Pastor Rick Warren with a place of great honor in his inauguration, President-elect Barack Obama maintains that he is a fierce advocate for gays.
“Look, um, I am a fierce advocate, uh . . . and the dictionary definition of ferocious is: marked by extreme and violent energy as in a ‘ferocious beating.’ I think we can all–gay, straight, black, white–agree that I have just delivered gays a pretty ferocious beating.”
Obama went on to say that he stands by his message of change for all Americans. “Look, if a gay person comes up to me with a five dollar bill, I’ll give him or her change. I’ll give him five ones, or four ones and four quarters, or three ones and twenty dimes. I’ll change a twenty or a ten or a hundred. ” With his trademark wry humor, he added, “Just don’t be spending that money on a wedding!”
UPDATE: 12/27/08. According to sources inside the Obama transition, President-elect Obama has stated that he will “not move for months, and perhaps not until 2010″ to make change for gays, regardless of the size of the currency they tender. Even though making change for all was an Obama campaign promise, Mr. Obama first wants to confer with the Secretary of the Treasury and his new economic appointees to reach a consensus on this issue. Gay activists, disgruntled at having to use $5 and $10 bills for small purchases like subway tokens, have planned an economic boycott. On January 20, gays plan to refrain from spending any money on anything anywhere. Economic analysts predict that the loss in revenue for that day alone will approach $12.5 billion, or roughly $42 for every gay person in America. Calling the gay community “an American economic mainstay,” one analyst said that the gay sector of the economy is “too big to fail” and might force a cascading effect in bailout disbursements. Were the boycott to continue, “our entire economy could collapse.” Gays are likely to be blamed for America’s economic woes in any case, as President-elect Obama’s strong consituency of evangelicals has already sought to blame gays for Hurricane Katrina, the disappearance of Amelia Earhart, and the controversial loss of the Seahawks at the hands of the Steelers in Super Bowl XL.
Those annoying and disturbing “hunh, huhn” grunts from John McCain
October 4, 2008 | Filed Under Other Satire/Intentionally Funny Stuff | Leave a Comment
It is hard to measure what the most annoying and unpresidential sounds and gestures to come out of the Palin-McCain campaign were this past week. For those who found McCain’s “how about the job she did last night” “hunh, hunh, hunh” sounds to be very disturbing, here is some comic relief:
If this doesn’t make you laugh, maybe you have not seen the original: